Dear Thera,
Now that it's getting colder, my humans are refusing to turn up the heat. When they discuss the possibility of doing so amongst themselves, they start looking anxious and mention "Carbon footprint." I have looked diligently out the window for traces of this Carbon or its footprints, and I have not seen any. Nor do I understand why a warmer house would attract this fearsome Carbon. They also seem to think Carbon is in the air. The only creatures I can think of that are in the air but also leave footprints are birds. Surely my humans are not afraid of a bird? Don't they know that cats are very good at hunting birds? My housemate and I could surely protect them from a Carbon bird!
I'm starting to think that the Carbon is a myth. Humans are very attached to their myths, after all. What do you think?
Carbon Skeptic
Dear Skeptic,
I understand your doubts. As I understand it, the Carbon--or at least its footprint--is a metaphor. That's not quite the same thing as a myth--a metaphor is real, but humans talk about it in ways that aren't quite real. So we can't actually see this footprint. It is some sort of abstract force that is causing Global Warming, and that's what a lot of humans are very anxious about. Turning up the thermostat (and many other actions) strengthens this force.
I bet you're wondering what's wrong with a little bit of warming, right? We cats love to be warm. But there's something I've noticed about warm weather. When it's colder, my housemates and I resolve our differences and learn to occupy the same bed or chair. When it's warmer, we have less motivation to get along and arguments break out pretty easily. I think that's what humans are worried about: that warmer weather will lead to more conflict. Also, I'm not sure humans tolerate the heat as well as we do. And besides, there can be too much of a good thing.
So my advice is that you humor your humans' stingy behavior with the thermostat. You and your housemate should be able to keep each other--and them--warm for the winter.
Happy snuggling,
Thera
Fall is here. As I watch out my window, the leaves are falling off the trees. Sometimes they get stuck on a window screen or on a spider web that's on the outside of the window. That's good for hours of entertainment.
What's less entertaining--and much more perplexing--is a curious seasonal habit that humans have. Twice a year, once in the spring and once in the fall, they shift all their routine activities by one hour. It happened just the other day. Suddenly everything was one hour late, including our meals.
This shift is called Daylight Savings Time. Actually, it's the shift to one hour earlier, which happens in the spring, that gets us onto Daylight Savings Time, while the shift to one hour later, which happens in the fall, gets us to Standard Time. But I only know this detail because my human has pedantic tendencies. Most of us just call the whole rigmarole Daylight Savings Time.
Daylight Savings Time is upsetting and disruptive to us cats, but observably so to humans as well. They get confused as to what they should be doing when and may have trouble getting to sleep on time or getting up on time. Apparently, the time shift can even cause accidents among humans. I'm not actually sure what kind of accidents they mean, but tripping over a cat while getting out of bed or cutting oneself while opening the cat-food can because of exceptional grogginess seem to be likely candidates.
Why, then, do they perform this strange and upsetting ritual? The term "Daylight Savings" suggests that they are trying somehow to conserve sunlight. And indeed, the part of the year during which they are on Daylight Savings Time is the sunnier part of the year. So Daylight Savings seems to work to increase sunlight. But frankly, I'm pretty sure that the days lengthen--and then shorten--of their own accord. I don't think the humans have anything to do with it.
Humans get funny ideas, though. In the past, they used to believe that their ritual actions influenced the natural world, and they performed all sorts of rites to ensure the continued progression of the seasons. They are mostly over this narcissistic way of thinking--but perhaps not entirely. Daylight Savings Time appears to be a holdover from just such a primitive belief system. They appear to believe that, by undergoing this shift in time twice a year, they are ensuring the proper lengthening and shortening of the days. Probably most of them don't actually believe it literally anymore, but with humans, tradition dies hard.
